The Wound

I have this wound on my thumb and I keep looking at it and thinking about how it resembles the days of my life right now. It is a good sized wound that I have no idea how I got. At first I ignored it, but it hasn't gone away. It has kind of become a part of me - a part of who I am.

The wound has tried to heal several times - but each time a scab forms to protect the wound and heal it I pick at it until it breaks open again. Or I bump it and it reopens and the hurt starts all over. I've tried to cover it, to protect it with a bandage - but even that has done more harm then good. I'm allergic to the bandage. So then on top of the wound I now have a rash. I honestly feel like I can't win for trying.

I know that I'm going to have a scar from this wound. This wound that I don't know how I got. This wound that doesn't seem to want to heal. This wound that has become a part of me. I look at it and wish that somehow I would wake up and it would just be gone - this wound. But I know that in order for it to heal I am going to have to give it some attention. I'm not going to be able to just look the other way. In order for this wound to heal I am going to have to put some medicine on it, and cover it. I'm going to have to find it in me to take the time and the energy to care for it.

And the scar will be there. It will remain. And it will remind me that I am human. I do make mistakes. But it will also remind me that I am strong. That I can work through hard things and come out the other side of them - not the same person I once was, but a person , hopefully, closer to God.